Time to Refocus My Perspective

Have you ever felt like someone has planted a microphone in your house?  Yesterday morning I had that thought. Not really, but SOMEONE was listening  to my conversation I had with Randy.

We had decided several weeks ago that we were getting overwhelmed with all the packing and had the feeling we were working from dawn to dusk every day. We were becoming exhausted. We concluded that we needed to make sure we were keeping healthy boundaries with our time and energy so we decided that we would keep Sunday’s as non-packing days.

Then we were gone for 6 days over last weekend. We came home to the need to tend to some other things besides packing. So we felt like we were a week behind.

That lead to the morning’s conversation. We talked about how we knew we’d said we wouldn’t pack on Sunday but given that we’d had so many days off, perhaps we really should try to get something done.

Then we went to church…

Like I said, someone had been listening to our conversation because how else would our pastor know to address this exact issue? Hmmm.

The sermon was about how Sabbath means pause.  How God has given us the gift of rest. Whether we take the gift or not, is up to us. Do I think I know better than God? Do I think that I won’t possibly get everything done if I don’t keep at it even on Sundays?

Even more important, do I believe that God has set the time table for our move? If I do then I must conclude that He already knew what we could accomplish in the time we have and that it could be done without working nonstop. If He, in His infinite wisdom, took a day of rest after creating for 6 days, surely he planned for us to be able to take time to rest too. Even with a deadline that is now  less than 5 weeks away.

So, instead of packing on our day of rest, we enjoyed lunch with friends, helped Jared brainstorm about what colors he wants to paint our house when he moves in and then had dinner with the family. It was a peaceful enjoyable day.

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of rest!

Exodus 33:14 And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

 

Feeling a Little Stuck

I’m definitely feeling stuck. The packing at the beginning was pretty easy. Sorting and putting things into boxes.  I think I was doing it in my sleep for a while too. It’s too bad all those boxes I packed in my head weren’t really packed in my house. I think I’d be done by now. At this point the progress has slowed considerably. It’s becoming harder to figure out what to pack and how to pack it. What should I park for storage? What will I need at Andrew’s? What will I still need to be using for the next 5 weeks?

This morning I was awake at 4:30.  I seem to be doing this more and more.  My brain begins working so early that it’s useless to try to go back to sleep.  So I got up and spent some time reading my devotional books and praying for the day.  Some days I think that is the only really peaceful time I have. The rest of the day is caught up in all the zillions of details that are starting to press in. My motto has become that quote from the Disney movie called Meet the Robinsons, “Keep moving forward.”

I met with a friend yesterday who is also in the midst of preparing for a long-distance move. I think our conversation encouraged both of us and reminded us that we aren’t alone in our feelings. It made me realize that I’m not crazy in how I’m handling all the details. She is having the same struggles.

One of the challenges from this week has been all the appointments and decisions to make about stuff like insurance and banking and transferring doctor’s records. Things that have a great impact but are tedious to attend to. There are so many things we take for granted and suddenly I am having to make decisions about changing so many of those things.

And if my house isn’t already a disaster area, we have the entryway floor torn up in preparation to be replaced. We had it on the list of things to do before winter.  Home projects in this house have never been easy. I think the builders or the previous owners had this hidden agenda to make the future owners lose their minds… slowly…one project at a time.  This particular project started with the simple removal of a layer of vinyl flooring that had cracked and begun to shred from the door catching it. That task was followed by the need to remove a thin sheet of plywood which was covering yet another layer of vinyl which was glued to the subfloor with something…permanent, requiring it to be removed with a chisel. At this stage, I have a partially  removed floor with random staples sticking out here and there. And we are scratching our heads. Three layers? Who does that? No wonder the front door was catching on the flooring.

The good news is that my old self, before the transformation that has been happening over the last 10 years, would have been unable to function with so many things going on. But I rejoice every day now, that I am able to feel a deep sense of peace knowing everything will work out as it needs to. I’ve learned so much about patience and perseverance , from much practice, that I don’t get nearly as ruffled as I used to. The glory goes to God. He has taken me one step at a time from a fretting worrier to someone who knows He has it all in His hands.

Romans 11:33-36  Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways! “For who has know the mind of the Lord, or who became His counselor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to him again? ” For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen.

God’s Timing is Perfect

We just returned from a 6 day trip to Ohio. That’s 2 days of driving for 4 days of visiting. These short trips are always over in a flash.  This one was no different. There are always so many people we would like to see but just don’t have the time.

This trip was about family, like it usually is. But  with a greater sense of urgency to spend time with people we love. My father turned 80 this year and I can’t figure out how that happened. He doesn’t seem old to me, actually in my mind he is still in his 50s.  Somehow the last 30 years have sped by. We tried to spend as much time as we could with family and then squeezed in a few friends as well.  And I had to make time for the grandchildren!

On our second day there, my  4 year old grandson, Jacob called me on the phone at six in the morning. He wanted to know if he could stay home from preschool and spend the day with me. What a gift!  We had lunch together, searched for eggs from the chickens and then spent half an hour cleaning our shoes.  We played with legos and he chattered about dozens of topics. It was a perfect day and ended with him jumping out of our van and saying, “I had a great day with you Grandma.”

One of the other things we had to accomplish on this trip was to deliver some of Aaron’s and Jason’s belongings that they’d left in Iowa and to pick up a grandfather clock.

Randy build the clock for my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary in 1984. While it was on “the list” of things we would inherit one day, it had stopped working and Dad had decided to give it to us now hoping that Randy would be able to get it running again. While they were loading the clock into the van I was thinking about all the years that had passed since we gave them that clock. So many wonderful memories as well as some very difficult seasons.  And now the clock was moving on to the next generation and would stand guard over many more family gatherings.

As we were traveling back to Iowa, I watched the scenery go by and realized that this would likely be the last time I would ever travel this route. While we will visit family in Iowa and Ohio, we probably won’t have reason to travel between the two. A while back I wrote a piece called Firsts and Lasts about how we often don’t recognize the last time we will do something. With this trip, there was a definite awareness of some “lasts” as well as some wondering about whether other things could perhaps be lasts as well.

We just never know what’s ahead. The only thing we can be sure of is that God’s timing is perfect. If our lives are in His hands, we can rest in the fact that whether it looks like it or not, the time line is also in His control. We’ve talked many times about how this Florida move is a few years late. My grandpa lived in Florida for more than 30 years, why couldn’t we have moved there while he was still alive? He would have been so happy to have family there with him. Why did everything wait until 2 years after he’d died?  It’s easy to get caught up in wondering why things didn’t work out differently. But I think that robs of us the joy of whatever season we’re in. We can’t change the past, and we are really not in control of the future either.

We really do need to be mindful of the verse in Ecclesiastes that says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time.”  (Eccl 3:11)

 

 

New Meaning for Buying in Bulk

We are definitely causing a few raised eyebrows.  And more than one person is “concerned that we are taking on way more than we can handle.”

First of all, when you following the Lord, you will ALWAYS be taking on more than you can handle. How else will He get the glory when it’s all said and done?

And secondly, if you are constantly worried about appearing foolish you will likely miss a lot of the blessings God has for you because you never take any risks.

With this move, we are definitely taking on more than we can handle and I’m sure there has been someone who has made the determination that we are being plenty foolish. But we didn’t make this decision until we were sure that we were sure.

When we finally decided that we were definitely moving, our son Josh said that he and his wife Maggie had been thinking about the same thing. This was sort of funny because he had been of the same mind as Randy about Florida. In fact, when we got home from our May trip, he said, “Just so you know. We will NOT be moving to Florida if that’s what you decide to do.”  It’s amazing how quickly God can change our hearts if we are willing.

So now the plans have been settled. The moving truck has been reserved and we are just six weeks from heading south. Randy will drive a 27 foot truck with a Toyota Camry towed behind. Josh and Maggie will be in their car and Alex and I in our van. We will take three days to make the trip. We’re praying for good weather and will be grateful for every mile further south and away from the threat of ice or snow.

And when we arrive?  There will be 14 people living under one roof. For how long? Who knows? Only God.  Can you imagine the trips to Costco? It’s a good thing we’ve been a large family for a long time and are used to this sort of thing. Back in the days when my boys were growing up they went through 16 gallons of milk every week. We should have had a cow.

This houseful will be much like it used to be for us. Raising 7 boys taught us a lot of lessons. Lessons about organizing time and resources. Lessons about giving up our own agenda and learning to serve one another. Lessons about making family come first.

It looks like we will be demonstrating these lessons learned for the next generation. I am excited to see what my grandchildren learn about surrendering self-centered ideals in order to bless the family. And I’m sure I and some other adults in the household will benefit from a refresher course.

We will certainly be buying food and other necessary items in bulk. Cooking and laundry will be a large scale operation. And showers will have to be scheduled to avoid running out of hot water. It will take two vehicles to go to church every week and to go any place together.

And you know what else I am praying will be delivered in bulk quantities?  Patience, love, forgiveness, laughter, and the opportunities to serve one another. No doubt we will have our challenges but the good we stand to gain and the memories we will make will be things to treasure.  And the glory will go to God.

 

 

 

I Have Too Much Stuff

Where did all this stuff come from? Some of the things I am sorting through I haven’t looked at since we moved them from Ohio. 10 years of sitting in a box collecting dust. Why?

I would guess that most homeschoolers are pack-rats to some degree. And homeschooling for 25 years, I have accumulated plenty of “valuable educational resources.” Well, with only one student left, and him in the 11th grade, how much of this stuff is really necessary? Oh, and how much of his learning is done online, requiring no “stuff” at all?  hmmm.

So I have purged out all the stuff we really won’t need from here on out. Only problem is, Andrew and Christine are homeschooling the grandkids. Surely they could use some of this stuff, right? So in the box it goes. I don’t need it but I’m moving it anyway! I wonder if the truck will be big enough?

And have I mentioned that Josh and Maggie are also moving to Florida? Their stuff will be on the truck too.  Perhaps I need to be more careful about what I am packing.

I did find out something useful. I will admit that when it comes to books, I have a hard time parting with them.  I know, I have a Kindle. I shouldn’t need so many books. But they might be useful and why re-buy them for my Kindle when I already have them?  So I sort. This pile to take. That pile to donate. That pile to throw away because the book is just plain worn out. What I’ve learned is that if I do this sorting and leave the piles alone for a couple of days, when I go back to start actually packing the books I’ve decided to take, I find myself weeding out many more. After I’ve had time to think about it, I realize that I really don’t need all of them after all. Perhaps I need to apply this technique to everything I decide to take! Only problem is that I didn’t figure it out until after I had packed…several…boxes. Oh, well. Nothing I can do about that now.

But seriously, this process has made me stop and think about all the stuff I have.  Some of it is family heirlooms that I want to pass down to my children and grandchildren. Some of it is stuff that I will probably never use but can’t bring myself to just throw away. I am finding it much easier to make the decision to get rid of something if I know that someone else will get some use out of it.

So I keep sorting, keep giving away and slowly my house is beginning to look empty.  Well, except for the mountain of boxes. The hardest part is trying to figure out what things I will need while we’re at Andrews and what should be put into storage. Since we will be with Andrew for an indefinite length of time it’s hard to plan. And it seems ridiculous to keep packing stuff that I KNOW will just be put in storage. Why can’t I just get rid of everything and start over?

The one  good thing about the fact that I have begun packing is that I don’t really have to clean my house. Mostly because I can’t FIND it!

The other significant thing that is happening is that as I sort and purge, I feel a sense of freedom. I am unburdening myself a little more every day. And I find it happening in my spirit as well. As I let go of things that are holding me back, I am free to move forward into what God has next. And I am excited to see what He has in store.

The Sorting, Purging and Packing Has Begun

In August, I went to Florida again, this time with my youngest son, Alex.  At this point we hadn’t made any decision about moving. This trip had been planned back in June because Alex wanted to visit Andrew and see his new home.

Randy and I talked on the phone daily. We were trying to decide if we were to purchase or lease a new vehicle and neither one of us had any real peace about it.  Since we hadn’t decided about the move yet, it seemed premature to be considering a new vehicle even though we’d been putting the equivalent of a car payment into our 2003 van every month since March. At one point I said, “We really can’t make any more plans until we decide if we are moving or not.”

Randy was quiet for a moment and finally said, “Can we just make the decision here and now that we are moving and see where God leads after that?”  So that’s what we did.  We’d prayed for months, and it was time to just take a step in faith. We knew if we were wrong, God would close the doors and we would find no way to make it happen. We were confident that He was leading. It HAD to be God for one very good reason.

For the  past 30 years we had traveled to Florida multiple times to visit my grandfather until his death in 2013. After Grandpa died, Randy said, “You know, I never really liked Florida. I wouldn’t feel bad if we never went there again.”  Now here we were with this unexplainable nudging that wouldn’t quit.  Yes, the grandkids were there, but they were in Ohio and God had not allowed us to make that move which made much more sense in our little brains.   God’s plans were definitely NOT the same as ours!

So during the trip Alex and I took to Florida, Randy and I were planning our future over the phone. We talked at length with Andrew and Christine and were told that they would love to welcome us into their home for however long it took for Randy to either find a job or get his own company to the point where it could support us.  This was a huge blessing.

You must understand that Andrew had just moved in March. He has 6 children under the age of 10 and had already welcomed his brother David into his home in June. Now he was extending that offer to Randy, Alex and I. That would create a household of 12.    Was he crazy? Probably.

So the wheels began moving. We began looking for warehouse space for Randy’s business and began the process of figuring when to make the move. Of course, the biggest challenge would be selling our home in Iowa. When we moved here from Ohio, Randy had to come ahead and was here for 6 weeks while we waited for our home to sell. We were hoping that wouldn’t have to happen this time. Could we just wait to go until after our current home sold? It seemed that would be the hinge pin that would control everything else.

Then the unexpected happened. It would be the first of a series of very surprising developments. Our son Jared called me one evening while I was still in Florida with Alex. His question was, “how serious are you and Dad about moving to Florida?” I answered that we were pretty serious. Then he said, “I would like to rent your house.”

Things seemed to be falling together without any manipulating on our part at all. Perhaps we had heard from God after all. Perhaps the adventure was for real!

The next thing we did was go to Home Depot and buy boxes. The sorting, purging and packing has begun!

Jonah is Alive and Well

I can identify so well with Jonah. I frequently find myself making the same choice that Jonah made. He heard instructions from God and he chose to go the other way.  I sometimes find myself making the choice to put off what God is directing me to do. I may not use the same method as Jonah. I don’t physically run away. But it’s avoidance just the same.

My methods are more subtle. Procrastination, excuses as to why I must have misunderstood God’s direction or even telling myself it wasn’t really God speaking to me in the first place. I’ve run from confrontation. I’ve run from communication. I’ve run from responsibility.

All is not lost though. I usually come around. And when I finally feel exhausted from running and I finally obey God I am still like Jonah.  I find it easy to get frustrated if the outcome of my obedience isn’t what I expected it to be.  God, I finally submitted and did what you asked and THIS is the outcome? Shouldn’t it have turned out differently?

I wish I could say that when I sense the Lord leading me to do something I always obey quickly without question. But, there is so much Jonah alive and well in me. If only I could trust the results to God.

The story of Jonah doesn’t end with Jonah’s disappointment about the outcome of Nineveh. In the book of Matthew Jesus speaks of Jonah.

Matthew 12:41 “the men of Nineveh will stand up with this generation at the judgment, and will condemn it because they repented at the preaching of Jonah. And behold, something greater than Jonah is here.”

When Jonah finally obeyed God, God caused the city to be saved. The reason those men of Nineveh can stand in judgment is that they are with God because Jonah preached to them and they repented. There is still hope for us modern day Jonahs. God can still use us if we are willing to submit to His guidance. He also wants us to be willing to accept the outcome and know that His ways don’t always measure up to our expectations.

The truth is, God will far exceed our expectations if we let Him have His way in our lives. And we won’t have to spend time in the belly of a fish.

 

How this Adventure Began

I’m sure someone is asking the question, “Why move from Iowa to Florida?”  In a word—grandchildren.

But actually that’s only one piece of the puzzle. A couple of years  ago we were considering a move back to Ohio because all eight of our grandchildren were there. We had two opportunities appear to be opening up to us but when we followed up with them both doors were closed. We decided it just wasn’t meant to be so we remained content to stay in Iowa.

Then last year, my husband Randy began to feel like a job change was definitely in  our future. After much prayer we made the decision to start our own company again. We’d had a business for about 15 years in Ohio and felt God directing us to start another company. We officially formed Cherry Ridge Creative Concepts in March of this year. We believed that by year’s end Randy would no longer be at the  job that had moved us to Iowa 10 years ago. We explored many options to get this new business off the ground but didn’t really have any clear direction. One difficulty was that Randy’s workshop isn’t heated and he loses several months each year to the cold Iowa winters.

Then we went to Florida to visit our oldest son, Andrew and his family. They had moved to Clearwater, Florida from Ohio in March. When we visited in May we would sit on his patio in the early morning and talk about our future. One morning we were enjoying the breeze and listening to the birds. Randy said,” You know, I think I could get  used to this.” For the first time, we looked at each other and knew that we were to begin to pray about another cross-country move.

We had all the pros and cons of such a move on our minds from morning till night every day of our 2 week visit. We talked with Andrew and Christine about all the details that would need to be addressed and went home with much to consider and pray about.

For the next 3 months we prayed and researched our options. In June our son David left home to move to Florida and just a day later, Aaron left home to move back to Ohio. We now had only one child still living at home.

I wasn’t prepared for my nest to be emptying so quickly! I was struggling with all the changes and at the same time feeling like this was just the beginning. There were many more changes coming! Change is never easy for me. My family teases me about how I can’t even rearrange my furniture. It’s fine the way it is, why change things?

But I know I can’t grow if I’m unwilling to change. I must decide if I trust God with my life or not. If I do, then I have to allow Him to direct the changes that will cause the growth. So at this point I am trying to trust and trying to look at the future with anticipation. I will never be the same….and that’s a good thing.

 

The Next Chapter for the Maxey Family

We bought our first house in 1982. It was a cute, story and an half bungalow built in the early 1900s. It had character and we loved it. My husband and I spent many hours on big and small projects, working together to make it a home. I was content with my little home and my growing family. At one point I remember a conversation with our neighbor about the project we were doing. He mentioned that certain kinds of projects helped increase the value of the home for resale. My response to him was something that makes me laugh now. I said I wasn’t very concerned about adding value since I didn’t see myself moving. In fact, I went even further and said I envisioned my grandkids coming to visit me in that house. Little did I know that God had other plans.

Just four years later we sold that house and bought another story and a half home on two acres in the country, fifteen miles from our first home. It had two bedrooms and one bathroom. To say that it was fixer-upper would be an understatement.

Over the years we steadily added boys to our family until we had five who all shared one bedroom. We’d dreamed for years about adding on more space and it seemed it was time to take action. We spent the next two years building an addition on our home that was larger than the original house. During the building, we added another son to our gang. At last the final inspection was complete and we moved into our new space just in time to welcome our seventh son in 1999. We spent five years making some incredible memories in that home. Again I had expected to have grandchildren visit me in that house and we almost made it.

In the Summer of 2005 we make the decision to move once again. This time it was much more than fifteen miles. We sold our large dream home , packed up six of our boys, a dog and two cats and moved almost 700 miles from the home we’d lived in for 20 years.  Two days before the moving truck left our driveway we learned that our first grandchild was on the way. To read more about that move read Monkey Bars.

We’ve had ten wonderful years in our home in Iowa. We’ve watched our boys grow into responsible, caring young men. Three are married now and three are young adults. The youngest will finish his homeschool journey in 2017.  When we moved to Iowa in 2005 I though sure it would be our last move. I guess I never learn!  God again has a different plan.

I believe at this point, God’s desire is that I begin to share our journey. We will be moving once again but unlike our last cross-country move when we had a job and no home, this time began with a home and no job.

I would like to invite you along for the journey. You can keep up with the adventures of the Maxey’s move from Iowa to Florida here on my blog. I welcome you to sit back and enjoy the ride!

Let the adventure begin!

 

 

God’s Way is Best

There’s a story in Jeremiah chapter 38 where Jeremiah is thrown into a cistern. It says he sank into the mud at the bottom of the cistern, where I’m sure he prayed for God to rescue him. Have you ever felt like you were in a pit and sinking fast?  Have you ever cried out to God to do a miracle and rescue you?

This story reminds me of an old illustration I heard many years ago.  The story went something like this…

A man was caught in a flood and climbed to the very peak of his roof where he sat down and prayed to God to rescue him. As he waited, a rescue boat came by but he waved them on saying that God would rescue him.  This happened again a few hours later when two men in a row boat came by but the man again waved them on saying that God was going to rescue him.  Hours later, the water was still rising and a helicopter came by but the man once again waved it on saying God would rescue him. Night fell and the water continued to rise eventually sweeping the man away to his death.  When the man was given audience with God in heaven, he said “Lord, I served you all my live.  Why didn’t you rescue me?”  God said to the man, “I sent you two boats and a helicopter!”

Sometimes God does amazing miracles that cannot be explained but other times He uses people to work in one another’s lives.

Two questions come to mind when I ponder this statement.

  1. Is my pride keeping me from allowing God to use others in my life?
  2. Am I so busy with my own agenda that I miss the guy sitting on the roof that God may have sent me to rescue?

Isaiah 55:8-9 says “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. “ For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.”

We must be willing to allow God to do things His way. We already know that His way is the best way.